A conceited man, with a big head, too

The women adored him; he loved this, he knew

But there was one not fooled, immune to him

His charms appeared shallow, his habits seemed grim

A boastful cad, a married man

Who’d seduced her friend, then upped and ran

He pushed and chased after her until she finally caved

She offered up the things desired, the things this bounder craved

A date was set with the lothario, a camera hidden too

Entranced and blinded by his lust, he never even knew 

But she was clever and artful, and he thought that he would win

He brought his balloon along with him, and she just brought her pin 

N.B., I removed the second verse that involved cyanide, a baseball bat, and some blunt shears.

John Regan, 2026.